They say “life is but a dream”. I believe a dream is all we have to guide us in our decisions. A memory, like a deja vu, as if to instill some assurance that we know the way…that we have been down this road before. Yet, my travels have proven to me that, though there is no ‘wrong way’ in our choices, we navigate by an inner gut feeling…a nuance of a sensation in the moment swaying us in one direction or another with no real assurance. I’ve found that what I’ve sometimes felt in the heart is numbed by confusion, lack of passion, discord, even desperation, and I’ve made but a guess as to what may bring happiness. I’ve found myself sitting idle at a ‘T’ in the road, at times, looking out the side windows at countless choices disappearing into the heat-radiation shimmer on the road in either direction. A sort of nothingness. Nothingness because we cannot prove existence beyond what we can see with our own eyes. We are fools to the eyes. We make a decision about which direction to take and then in each moment we create a path before us as we press on projecting the story onto the screen behind us. It only happens in this way. Step by step.

We make that decision and choose that direction seemingly following our hearts. Yet, what if our hearts are fools as well? What if in our blindness, we lose sight of the things that matter and those who have supported us–even elevated us. I wonder if we elevate on our own accord or are we in fact held aloft by the love of those we surround ourselves with–those who reflect back to us our magnificence? I ponder if we’d even exist if it weren’t for our reflection cast upon another. If there were only one human on the planet and nothing to validate their existence, could they even prove they exist? Would they even exist? What determines existence?

What are memories but stored files to recall moments shared with some reflection of ourselves? Think for a moment about those who have walked by your side. Feel in your heart the gratitude that rises to the surface and with such vibrations, make decisions that honor those reflections of yourself. Be the protector. Be the giver. Make the sacrifice. Graciously receive. Live with honor and integrity. Try to let go of your vision of perfection. Allow your dream to guide you toward what you are hopeful to receive. To hold out for a perfect scenario of an experience is to deny yourself at least some level of satisfaction and frankly, time is incredibly short. Allow the experience to unfold in its own way and don’t turn a blind eye so quickly.

I’ve played witness to the results of my own choices and have seen at times how my complaints about life dishonored the experiences I’ve had rather than simply being grateful for the gifts they provided. We can aim for the sweet spot, but in reality, true stability is like standing on a log floating in a river. Moments of true balance are rare and not only should we be thankful for them when we are gifted their presence, but we should be as grateful for the moments that even come close. I haven’t always appreciated these moments and haven’t always expressed honor and gratitude for the gifts the dream has provided in the process. I believe that humanity acts variably, yet collectively, so if I am seemingly guilty of such practices, then likely others–my reflections–are as well.

What stands before you? What are you being faced with? What are you longing for that you may have kept at bay because you’ve held out for the perfect experience? How can you allow yourself to receive a gift to feed that longing by simply allowing life to unfold with a seemingly imperfect variation of the experience you desire? If you desire something and have yet to receive it, well, maybe you’ve set too many conditions. Maybe it’s time you evaluate what it is you want and determine if there is a way to break down the experience into smaller acceptable steps. You are the architect of your dream. Move forward and be open to the countless variations.

In 2012, my travels took me over 13,000 highway miles to more than 20 North American destinations over the course of 9 straight months. Each night, I found myself laying in the darkness of a different hotel room than the one the night before. Early on in my travels, I’d often lay there negotiating what my perfect experience would have been that day and what the perfect picture of tomorrow could be. Eventually, I began to let go of that vision and process and instead began to embrace the adventure moment by moment.  It wasn’t always an ideal experience, but looking back and watching the story replay in my mind, collectively, the 9-month experience was magical.

Maybe it’s time to look back upon an experience you’ve had in the seeming past and find true perfection in the broader, collective view. Or maybe looking forward you can allow the moments–even the challenging ones or the seeming shortcomings and imperfections–to blend together into an overall masterpiece of perfection. The fact that you exist at all is a miracle and with it, every experience in every moment is pure magic.